Driving with Death

Giggles has been ... well... I'm going to call it "happy challenged" lately. I really think I am going to have to think of a better name for Giggles because he isn't doing a lot of giggling anymore. More like volcanic eruptions. But I don't want to rename him Volcano (despite the accurate description).

With his chaotic beginning in his early years before his adoption I understand his need for order and control. But this desire to control everything comes in conflict with mom and dad when we ask him to do something and he doesn't want to do what he is told.

Result: Volcano.

So after having a temper tantrum from 3:30 to 6:00 yesterday I braced myself for today. Frankly I have to brace myself for EVERYDAY. This morning's trigger was when he realized that I had moved his socks from the middle of the living room floor back to the pile of laundry on the couch. "Now I will have to find them all over again!" he shouted.

Really? Socks? To me, this is not a big deal. To him... apparently it was a HUGE deal.

After several other incidents in the process of getting ready for school which I tried to diffuse, I was going to attempt to send him on the bus but he had his mad face and was stomping before and after the prayer and Wannabe said, "does he HAVE to come?" Wannabe waved his hand over Giggles' head and said, "he was like Death yesterday."

Seriously... he called his brother Death. DEATH! (I admit I laughed on the inside while keeping a straight face.) But how could I send Death on the bus? Could you?

I just couldn't.

So I drove Death to school.

Not a "Real" Job

Sheriff is shadowing his dad today at work. Ever since his teacher announced last month that the class needed to chose a profession to follow for a day, Sheriff knew immediately that he would pick his dad to follow around at work.

Why not me? Isn't doing laundry, washing dishes, paying bills, running errands, preparing sharing time lessons, grocery shopping and cooking and cleaning exciting enough for him!?!

I mean really!

I gave him several opportunities to change his mind but apparently even if he DID have the desire to follow me around learning how he could one day grow up to be a mom he would have been docked 100 points for choosing a job that doesn't pay any money.

WHAT????????

Because what I do is not a "real" job seeing as I don't get paid. I hope no stay home mom really thinks that and I'm disappointed that points would be docked for choosing this option.

"What DO you get paid?" Sheriff asked me this morning.

I get the personal satisfaction of seeing my boys grow up to be well-adjusted adults who know how to work hard. (Please let that happen.)

I think parents work more on small bonuses verses regular paychecks. I get my evening hugs from my kids which I treasure. Many days I have to wade through a lot of conflict management to get to those hugs.

I was having a particularly hard day with one of my boys and a Primary song came to my mind. I sat down at the piano and opened the book to find it. Strangely enough the songbook opened directly to the page - #178

These are some of the words:

Teacher do you love me?
Teacher will you care for me?
Even if I turn away,
or disobey,
or go astray,
Then will you love me still?

I need your love, I need your light
to show me how to be like Jesus.
The Savior's love will light the path
To lead me safely home.

Oh yes, my child I love you.
My child I'll always care for you.
And with the Savior as our guide,
I'll share the light I feel inside,
And you will feel his love for you.

They touched my heart because as parents we are constantly teaching our children. There are times when I throw my hands up in the air in frustration and wonder what I can try next. But inevitably that frustration gives way as love wins over.

Mother do you love me? Oh yes, my child I love you.

No More Birthdays! Kind of...

I am DONE with birthdays!!! Kids birthdays that is. At least for this year. Brett has the big 40 coming up so I'll have to stock up on grim reaper party supplies for that.

But it feels good to be done with the kid birthday parties. I think Wannabe's party guests must have sensed that they were the final crew because they pumped up the volume with a screaming contest. I had flashbacks to my childhood when my mom was at work and someone suggested a screaming contest. (That didn't go over very well with my little sister by the way.) I think my ears are still recovering from 12 screaming boys. Does amazon.com sell hearing aids? They seem to sell everything else.

I think that having a pinata at a party for 11 year olds may have been pushing it but who doesn't love going home with a bag full of candy?



This party had a Skylanders theme. Believe me... I was worried about planning it because Wannabe changed his mind several times in the last few months. (Star Wars, Minecraft, Pokemon, Doctor Who, Skylanders then back to Minecraft, Adventure Time then back to Minecraft then back to Star Wars then finally back to Skylanders.)

Of course I turned to the internet and Pinterest for some ideas for the party. The Skylanders cakes were waaaaaay too elaborate for me to even attempt so I settled for cupcake rings that I ordered on Amazon.com and I found an easy invitation idea on Pinterest as well as some great games to play.

I wish I had pictures of the games but trying to keep 12 boys occupied with games and take pictures of them at the same was more than I could do.

Once Brett was on the scene with pizza and helping with the cupcakes I had my camera in hand.

Note, however, Brett's handiwork with the cupcakes. I had given him the assignment of getting candles for the cupcakes. He bought candles that spelled out "Happy Birthday". In order to accomplish this he put them in the individual cupcakes but then he needed to plate the cupcakes. He improvised and used the pizza box. I didn't notice until I was looking through the camera as he brought the flaming cupcakes over. I just shook my head.... pretty cupcakes on a greasy pizza box. Must be a guy thing or something.

Anyways, the presents were also a hit and he loved what he received.

I loved that I survived yet another birthday party and I get to take next year off! Yay!!!

Don't Throw Rocks at the Ducks

I am quite sure that I have told the story of my brother and the ducks before. I must have. Because it reminds me so often of my "little boys" and the things they do.

I think that if I ever write a book about my boys the title will HAVE to be "Don't Throw Rocks at the Ducks". In case I haven't told you about it, the incident bears repeating. My brother was about five-years-old at the time and there was a park and lake close to our home that we often went to. My mom must have had some problems with my brother prior to our outing to the park because she listed a series of rules to him before we set out for the park. The park had a giant metal slide perfect for burning your butt on a hot summer's day, a merry-go-round and teeter-totter that we loved to play on. Down close to the bay that came in off the lake Canadian geese often walked along the grass. My mom turned her back for a moment. When she heard the geese honking in distress she turned around only to find my brother throwing rocks at them. Of course she scolded him for the rock throwing but instead of being contrite he responded, "but mom, you didn't say don't throw rocks at the ducks."

That saying, "you didn't say don't throw rocks at the ducks" has been repeated several times over the years in our house growing up and in my house now as a bewildered parent I look at the things my kids do and shake my head in astonishment at the excuses I hear.

Like when one of my boys draws all over his walls after getting in trouble several times for it on prior occasions and then has the nerve to say, "but you didn't tell me not to touch that spot." What??? The instruction "don't draw on your WALLS" implied EVERY SINGLE SPOT.

Or yesterday when another son was in a hurry to get to the basement to clean up in order to play his DS but I interrupted him to get his homework done first. His response, "you NEVER let me clean up my toys!!!" Huh? This is the kid that has a temper tantrum most days when I ask him to clean up his Legos.

I talked with a friend today whose children are grown. I love talking with her because she has a great sense of humor and has survived raising her kids. It gives me hope that I can do the same. Your kids are going to do things and say things that may have you grinding your teeth, biting your tongue or have you reaching for the ibuprofen to kill the stress headache. But fortunately life also provides those moments when they bring home a picture just for you that they drew at school, or they can't go to bed at night without a hug from you. If my kids liked me all the time then I'm not doing my job as a parent. I require them to follow rules and at times that causes unhappy kids. They'll thank me later.

I thanked my parents.

I don't expect that thank you for a really, really, really, long time.

I DO expect that I will have many more moments that will have me shaking my head and saying to myself, "you didn't say don't throw rocks at the ducks."