Realizations...

I can't say that having this surgery has been a life-changing event per say but it has given me a few new experiences and some time in bed (I would rather have gone without) to come to some realizations of things I love and hate.

I LOVE hugs and kisses from my boys.  And I hate that I'm missing out on so many of them being at arms-length orders from my doctor.  I can't afford for my nose to be bumped and undo all the good that has been done.

I love Dede's humidifier that she lent to me.  Much better than the Vicks one we had ages ago and DI'd (sorry to whoever picked THAT gem up - it basically spit water into the air which landed on the carpet soaking it).

I love my MacBook.  I missed you so much, yes I did, I'm sorry I was gone for so long.  I promise I won't do it again.  Did you miss me too?  ahem.... sorry about that... private conversation.

Individually I nothing against distilled water, baking soda, salt and bulb syringes.  But  combine these items together and squirt them up your nose twice a day for three weeks.... you'll come to hate them.  You'll only make the mistake once of not heating the water before you do it. .. lesson learned. brrrr. 

I don't know who wrote the instructions for this procedure but they couldn't have performed it on themselves because I don't think the words "irrigating regularly ...will...increase comfort" belong together....

I love order.  I hate chaos.  This, however, is what my house looks like right now while I am recovering.  Maybe I should have chosen eye surgery with bandages covering my eyes for the next few weeks.

When you are on pain medications you need to up your fiber. (if you don't know why I'm not going to explain it).  Fiber cereals are typically pretty nasty.  Brett found me one I now love (for a fiber cereal). 

I have come to hate the feeling of gauze under my nose.  

 

I'm becoming claustrophobic with it.  I also look like a dork (I know, I know, some of you are thinking... but she's already a dork.  I kind of walked into that one right?)  I went out in public for the first time yesterday.  People look and then quickly look away.  It's quite funny but at the same time I feel silly. (sillier than usual being the dork that I am.)

I also hate that I can't blow my nose... oh and when people laugh about the fact that I can't blow my nose... or say things like "I need to blow my nose...aw, forget it...I'm too comfortable to blow my nose...I'll do it later" cause they know it will rile me up because they choose NOT to blow their nose when they COULD HAVE!!!!  That just isn't right!!! cruel... so cruel.  

Although I have noticed that the boys have had a tougher time with their behavior since I have had surgery (they don't like change) ... I love that they have been softer with me ... Smiley usually mentions my nose at least 3 times in his bedtime prayer "bless mom bloody nose... bless mom nose get better... mom has owie nose."  

I love that I'm starting to feel better and can do things like blog, drive the car (seriously April I'm not on painkillers anymore), make dinner, walk on the treadmill for a few minutes, work on my Sunday School lesson, take pictures with my camera, read and even enjoy a few minutes of t.v.  All things I was unable to do for a few days because of migraines (a by-product of the surgery).  It made me appreciate my everyday health even more and how even though headaches are a daily occurrence and migraines multiple times a week, my medication does a decent job of keeping me at a functioning level most of the time.  For that I am soooo grateful. 

 I realized how much I really DO accomplish despite my limitations.  We all have strengths and weaknesses but I have seen in my weakness how strong I really am and I have seen through the service of others how I am strengthened by those around me.  It is a beautiful thing and has touched my heart and inspires me to be a kinder, more caring person to others around me.  Thank you for your service, love and well wishes that are helping me on to a speedy recovery.