Brett's Plan of Attack

I promised I would tell you Brett's plan of attack for my forray to church tomorrow.  Because I'm not bright enough to get someone to replace me in teaching Gospel Doctrine tomorrow I must go myself and teach.  So we were in bed the other night and I told Brett that I was worried about being in the halls and getting my nose bumped while I'm still recovering from surgery.  I said that I was thinking of wearing my gauze moustache to church so that people would know to be careful around me and give me some space (I would take it off during my lesson ... because hey... who can take me seriously with that thing on???).  

No sooner had I finished telling him what I was thinking when I felt the waves of horror and embarassment (for him not me) flooding off him in the dark.  

sidebar:  once years ago when I had a really bad knee and we were going to the CN Tower and the line was freakishly long the suggestion was made that perhaps we could get a wheel-chair for me because there was no way I could stand in that long line with my knee.  Brett said that he would DIE of embarassment if he had to push me in a wheel-chair.  I was out of luck.  I when I get old.... I mean really older than I am now.... I hope that I don't become an invalid in a wheel-chair because I wouldn't want to be an embarassment to my husband.  

back to our night-time conversation:  Brett quickly outlined his plan... I would get up and leave sacrament meeting before it ended ..... whoa there!!!! before it ends?????  me??? get up and leave before the prayer???? now waves of horror were coming off of me!!!!  

The halls would be empty.... (who are we kidding?  what about all the people that hang out in the hall with their kids and sit on the couches because we all KNOW the couches are WAY more comfortable than the pews.)  

Then I would be in the Relief Society room before the mad rush after the closing prayer.  I could stay there until the end of church (what about my pee break??? that's just inhumane) and I would wait in the Relief Society room for an extra 15 minutes until the halls are clear and I can make a break for the car.  (isn't there another ward after us???)

I don't know about this plan.... I'm seriously considering the gauze moustache.  Remember I'm color coordinating it now.  I'm thinking red for tomorrow.....

p.s. as much as my gauze moustache may cause him some embarassment (come to think of it he hasn't appeared in public with me wearing it) Brett has been awesome!!! He could outdo Mr.Mom anyday!!! This past week he has done anything and everything to make our family and household run smooth.  kudos Brett!!!!